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  • PinkPanther 12:39 pm on March 18, 2019 Permalink | Reply  

    Don’t know why 

    I like him and I don’t know why

    Don’t ask and I revert with sigh

    Way too young for me who is nearing forty

    While I heard, he’s just in his mid-thirties

     

     

    I decided to simply keep this to myself

    Not yet crazy, not digging my own grave

    Impossible! No way I will let him know

    As I’m not good with facing attack  of “No’s”

     

     

    Rejection will never be an option for me

    So why should I announce it in the open

    I still do love myself more or who else will

    So will just let go of this weird indescribable feeling

     

     

    If only he knew he has this impact on me

    To the point I resort again to writing poetry

    If only he knew, I would like to sing a duet

    As if I imagine he is a Romeo next to a Juliet

     

     

    It’s been a while facing again this enchanting magic

    Emerging from a chain of failed attempted relationships

    Strange goosebumps, whenever he’s near are so freaky

    Like butterflies kicking their way out from my tummy

     

     

    Or probable reason is I find this a little challenging

    For I believe he can never be mine, hence more exciting

    The thrill of liking someone who will never ever be yours

    Like Quasi May-September affairs everywhere, is it a crime to admire younger boys

     

     

    Let me park my pen and swiftly go back to Dreamland

    Expecting there I will be reborn and  again be young

    Where I can reach and halt the tick of the biological clock

    Saying goodbye to reality and sorrowful moments be blocked

     

     

    I’ll just let this mood fade and slip away

    Like the gloomy atmosphere on a rainy day

    I just let this one-sided connection disconnect on its own

    Emotions won’t be reciprocated so go back to being lone

     
    ===========

     

     
  • PinkPanther 12:39 pm on February 24, 2019 Permalink | Reply  

    When Was the Last Time 

    When was the last time you ran under the rain

    Without the umbrella above your head

    Without worries that you would get soaked

     

    When was the last time you kissed passionately

    When your world just stopped abruptly

    Just you and him with no words in between

     

    When was the last time you helped a stranger

    Not waiting anything in return

    An angel on earth you’ve become

     

    When was the last time you danced wildly

    As if no one is watching your motions

    With your emotions all out

     

    When was the last time you did nothing for a day

    For one freaking whole day

    Just lying on the couch and watching telly

     

    When was the last time?

     
  • PinkPanther 12:28 pm on February 24, 2019 Permalink | Reply  

    Tipo ng mga kaibigan ng broken-hearted 

    So broken hearted ka kamo?
    Dito me makilala kung san category mo malalagay ang mga katropa mo.. 
    Meron kasi tatlo klase ng tao:
    -Unang grupo,  hahayaan ka lang nila, di ka pakikialaman. Yun mere presence lang nila khit nasa sulok ka lang make you feel na parte ka pa rin ng grupo pero may sarili kang problema that you deal by yourself (this I prefer)
    – yun pangalawa, pag galit ka, mas galit sila, pag malungkot ka, mas palulungkutin ka. Although the intention is sincere, makakatulong sila pero temporary lang.  Dapat kinabukasan, iba na approach nila. Hindi araw araw. Mapapagod sila, mapapagod ka rin. Uubusin nyo lang energy ng isa’t isa. 
    – at yun pangatlo, easy lng.  Chillux lang. Bibiruin ka. Eto yun approach na gusto nila makamove ka ng mabilis. As in now na! Gusto lang siguro nila sabihin na ok lang yon, this too shall pass. Yun nga lng, sa pabiro at minsan nakakaasar na approach. Nakakainis pero in the long run, sila yun alam mo na makakapgblik sa yo to real world, to your old self as if nothing happened. They will make you feel that what  you’re going through is just normal situation if you risked to be in a relationship, no big deal kaya wag na sayangin ang enerhiya at tapusin na ang hikbi at iyak!
    So alin sa tatlo mo ang mga kaibigan mo ?
     
  • PinkPanther 1:03 pm on October 14, 2018 Permalink | Reply  

    Out of nowhere.. naisip ko lang…. 

    Fitness:

    • sa mga lalaki, piece of advice…hanggat maaari wag simulan ang pag gym ng sobra bata pa. Teens pa lng sa mga panahon ngayon gusto na magpalaki ng katawan! Mag-gym na lang pag nalampasan nyo na ang pagtangkad stage.  Ayaw nyo maniwala? Check mo  kapatid mo lalaki na di pa ng-gym. Malamang na matatankaran ka nya.

     

    Showbiz:

    • Pansin ko me similarity si Yassi Pressman at Maxene Magalona. May sosyal vibes sila pero mararamdaman mo na mababait sila.

     

    Relationship:

             Oo convenient, pero hanggat maaari .. consider  mo ‘ to

    1. wag magsama sa isang bahay ang magkaibigan
    2. wag magsama sa bahay ang mgkatrabaho
    3. wag magsama sa bahay kung same church kayo

    at kung sakali halimbawa magkasama na kayo sa bahay…..

    1. wag magapply sa kumpanya kung san sya ngtatrabaho
    2. sa ibang church ka dumalo

          I agree iba iba naman ang tao pero para iwas issue at conflict, mas maganda na hindi  kayo pareho present sa lahat ng lugar na andun ka. Trust me on this. 

     
  • PinkPanther 2:20 pm on October 13, 2018 Permalink | Reply  

    Her version.. His version 

     

    Her Version

    “ Miss, Miss, puwesto ko yan” , yun lang narinig ko. Medyo naalimpungatan pa ata. Half sleep pa ba tawag don. Kung baga half of my thoughts, naiwan pa sa ere at yun kalahati nakabalik na sa lupa. Sobrang antok ko talaga. Gusto ko pa matulog. Masakit na ang braso ko dahil sa bigat ng ulo ko sa pagkakasuporta pero ala ako pakialam. Sino ba tong gumising sa akin?

    “Miss, miss, bawal matulog sa library”…. Grrr.. at ngyon di lng ako ginigising. Pinagbabawalan pa. Sumusobra na ata to ha.

    Kahit napipilitan tumunghay na rin ako kasi mukhang ala atang balak umalis sa tabi ko ang boses na nanggigising sa napaksarap na pgkakatulog ko. ..

    “Ah sorry, bawal ba!”

    Nakita ko sya.. lalaki obviously pero di ko na tinitigan or tiningnan.. ala ako pkialam. Kinuha ko na mga gamit ko na nsa ibabaw ng mesa or ala lingon lingon umalis na. Nbubuwisit ako. Siguro akala nya ginagawa kong pahingahan lng ang library. Di nya alam na halos madaling araw ako nakatulog para masimulan yun project ko. Anyway, la na ko pakialam.. hanap na lng ako ng ibang lugar na pede ko pagpatuloy ang tulog ko.

     

     

    His Version

    Sa araw-araw meron talaga akong tyak na puwesto sa library. Hindi nman sa pgmamayabang pero medyo kilala rin ako dito sa campus. So alam ng estudyante maski nga mga professor na yun sulok na yon na di masyado naabutan ng araw, puwesto ko yon….

    So kahit maraming bakanteng tables.. dun ako dumidiretso..

    At yun mga estudyante naman, kahit ala ng bakante at yun lng natitira..iikot talaga sila, pupunta sa ibang floors wag lng nila kunin ang puwesto ko kasi baka bigla ako dumating.

    So just imagine my surprise.. hala! Bakit parang me naglakas loob na umupo ron..and to make it worse, natutulog pa! Grrrrr… Pag ganitong pagod ako sa basketball practice namin at may trabaho pa ko mamaya, wag nila asahan na ok ang mood ko. Pagod ako at gusto ko sa komportable kong puwesto na di nasisikatan ng araw. Sabihin na may pagkavampire ako. Eh sa gusto ko medyo malilim eh.

    So ginising ko yun babae. Di ko na natitigan or tiningnan. Ala ako pakialam. Gusto ko lang makuha ang puwesto ko.

     

     

    Her Version

    “Grabe, kalalaking tao, napaka-ungentleman”. Nagdidilim na paningin ko. Gusto ko sumigaw pero syempre nasa loob pa ko ng library.. mamya na lng paglabas.

    Bakit kasi ang layo ng pinto? Bakit ba napakalaki ng library na to? Iba talaga pag eskuwelahan ng mayayaman”. Hay, minsan napapaisip ako kung dito ba talaga ako nabibilang. Parang saling pusa lng ako rito. Napadpad lng.

    Siguro kaya mahilig rin ako sa mga koreanovela or mga Taiwanese series kasi nakikita ko sarili ko sa knila. Lalo na sa Meteor Garden at Boys over Flower! Kasi pakiramdam ko peg ko si Sanchai at Jandi.

    Di mayaman pero may diskarte. At napadpad sa mundo ng mayayaman.

    At kaibahan ko lng .. so far, ala pa nman nambubully sa akin. Ala pa kong na mimeet na “ mean girls”. Tama, siguro pagpatuloy ko lang ang low profile image ko.. at ala makkapansin sa akin.

    Buti na lang me uniporme sa school na to. So di masyado halata na naiiba ako. Sana lng ma-maintain ko ang pagkablue ng uniporme ko at di kagad kumupas.

    At isa ko pang kaibahan, ala pa akong na-meet na F4 rito. How I wish na ala nga!

    2 weeks pa lang nman ako rito sa bago kong school so di pa natin alam. Marami pang araw.

     

     

    His Version

    “Napaka-ungentleman”… narinig ko pa ang halos pabulong pero naririnig rin nman na komento ng babaeng pinakiusapan ko na umalis.

    Well , sige na nga. Di ko naman pinakiusapan. Kahit ngsalita naman ako ng “Please” medyo me inis ang tono ng boses ko so di nga masasabi na pakiusap yon”

    Kahit nakatalikod na sya, alam ko na newcomer sya sa school. Paano? Una, alang may lakas ng loob na mgkomento ng ganoong kalakas na boses sa akin. Malakas ang loob. Pangalawa, di nya alam na puwesto ko ang lugar na yon di nasisikatan ng arawAt pangatlo, may kakaiba syang amoy. Hindi mamahalin na perfume pero mabango. Sa pgkakataon na yon dun ko nalaman na di kelangan na mahal na perfume para maging sexy at attractive sa lalaki ang isang babae.

    Hay, ano ba tong pinagiisip ko . Parang amoy lng. Di ko nga nakita mukha. Tapos narinig ko nga ang boses, asar pa.

    Magkalimutan na. Basta masaya na ako I claimed what’s mine.. yun sulok ni “Edward” , kesyo me pagka vampire raw ako! 

     
  • PinkPanther 1:14 pm on November 6, 2017 Permalink | Reply
    Tags: , , depression,   

    On the edge 

    Sometimes when you’re down

    And you feel that the world is against you

    When you look behind and you see no one

    And no one sitting next to you

     

    When you’re heart is crushed

    And your spirit is drowning

    When your eyes couldn’t cry no more

    As you’re exhausted from breathing

     

    When you’re embarrassed to face tomorrow

    And you don’t feel like getting up the next day

    When you feel like slapping yourself

    As you could not hurt someone else

     

    When you walk on thorns

    And brushing the cold wind

    When you’re enduring the heat and pain

    As you’ve got no choice

    You just have to bear it

     

    How can you continue your life

    How can you breathe again

    How can you open your eyes the next day

    And start as if nothing happened

    How can you forget everything in a snap

    And continue to move on

    To move forward

    To cherish a brand new day

    To bury the past

    To dream again

     

    How to live again

    When you feel like you’re a living dead

    How can you face tomorrow

    If you have to start all over again with this cycle

    How can you get up

    When you feel like you’re down forever

     

    How can you say

    I was dead

    But now .. can I live again?

     
  • PinkPanther 3:14 pm on August 22, 2017 Permalink | Reply  

    Brace yourself 

    in Your hand, I commit my spirit

    Redeem me O Lord, O God of truth.

     

    Today, I have so many realizations. (yes, again)that I strongly desire to share with you. There are times in our life that we felt that we are left behind, that our prayers remained unaswered even though we earnestly pray for these things or we religiously seek for these needs. Sometimes, we are put into circumstances where we subconsciously lean on this side of having this self-pity syndrome knowing that our efforts are futile.

     

    However, it is also through these scenarios where we intentionally struggle to determine beforehand what is in store for us. Through these difficulties, we cling to a higher spiritual mode than relying on our selfish perspective in life. We see through these situations… we read between the lines, we pay special attention to the object itself and not just to the dark shadow it produces. We become more observant, more analytical, more objective, more forgiving, more patient, more humane and more thankful.

     

    Counting your blessings has deemed to be an ultimate option for us not just to ease the pain or disappointments that kept on wrestling inside our minds, but moreso to become more sensitive of the role we play or we should be playing in this society of blessings-seeking people!

     

    How can you be different? How can you be thankful if you feel that your prayers are still unanswered? How can you be patient knowing that your needs are already in the bag? That your wants and needs are already answered and are coming in the most unexpected moment of your life? How can you be a living testimony if you yourself are doubting if your prayer will be answered? It’s a matter of believing.. of having this faith on something unseen. It’s believing, trusting, depending on the powers of a Higher Being who made and is making everything possible according to His will. It’s believing not simply on “coincidence” but coincidence with Divine intervention. Everything is happening to your life.. because He said so and not just because that is what you wanted it to be. You’re just a passenger in this vehicle called ‘life’ and unless you let Him as your driver, then you’re driving your car in your passenger’s seat. Come to think of it. Just by imagining how difficult it is to do that… that is exactly what you are doing in your real life. Extending your arms to reach the steering wheel, your legs to reach the brakes while your eyes fixed on the road to keep the wheels on the go!! Bumping into something or someone is just a second away!

     

    Yeah I know, I am just typing my thoughts as they come. And sometimes these are just clutters on my mind.. but what the heck! This is my blog anyway(he he) and most of the time I am sharing these ideas with my inner self.. for her to read in her spare time..when everything calms down. 🙂 When her mind is open and receptive enough! 🙂 I guess she’ll appreciate this much much more at that moment. Until then, I will just let my thoughts pour and write them down….

     

    -greentwo

    (5 May 2010, 12:18am)

     
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